swan song

Ok, stvar je naocigled vrlo jasna. Ako su ti navodni prijatelji upravo to, navodni, iliti pseudo/kvaziprijatelji, treba ih odjebat, pokopati duboko pod zemlju, po mogucnosti doslovno, i staviti kriz na cijelu tu stvar. Ili veliki kamen. Svakako probosti grob ili vec nekoga ili nesto glogovim kolcem. Amnezija bi takodjer dobro dosla. Ako amnezija nije na raspolaganju, lobotomija pomaze. E, ali ja redovno imam apstinencijske krize. Stalno padam u napast stupit u kontakt s ljudima za koje se pokazalo da su, iako mozda zabavni, totalna govna. Ne zato kaj bi ja htjela gacat po govnima, da se razumijemo, nego mi fale ljudi u zivotu, to je. No man is an island, kako se lijepo kaze. I kaj je to sa mnom, da za prijatelje biram sebicnjake ranga tipova koji bi djetetu iz etiopije oteli koricu kruha pokrivenu muhama iz usta? Odsad nadalje bih trebala odrzavati iintervjue za posao frenda, onak, vise profesionalno, da ne bude zezancije, neispunjenih obecanja i laznih ocekivanja. Jos samo da si sredim frizuru nalik na onu Donalda Trumpa, i bit cu spremna na legendarnu recenicu: “You’re fired!”

An airplane takes off from the airport. The Captain is Jewish and the
First Officer is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together and
it's obvious, by the silence, that they don't get along.
After thirty minutes the Jewish Captain mutters: "I don't like Chinese."
The First Officer replies: "Oooooh, no like Chinese? Why dat?"
"Your people bombed Pearl Harbor. That's why I don't like Chinese."
"Nooooo, noooo, Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah. That Japanese, not Chinese."
"Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese... it doesn't matter, you're all alike."
Another thirty minutes of silence. Finally, the First Officer says: "No
like Jew."
"Why not? Why don't you like Jews?"
"Jews sink Titanic."
"The Jews didn't sink the Titanic. It was an iceberg."
"Iceberg, Goldberg, Rosenberg, Spielbe rg; no mattah ... all da same."

rolanje, jarun, sada? any volunteers?

sinoc, dok sam cekala da moj workaholic dodje kuci (ma nije workaholic, ali when job needs to be done, he does it, za razliku od mene koju proudly choose to ignore it) gledala sam neki dokumentarac o morskim psima na sloveniji e sad, jedna od vrsta, plavi morski pas koji ne napada ljude ako bas ne ispadnu iz aviona ili se na neki slican misfortunate way ne zateknu usred morskog bespuca povijesne zbiljnosti, inace se hrani uglavnom lignjama, pogotovo u vrijeme mrijescenja. ter, bace se usred jata i zderu ko sumanuti, ter se naravno, kao i svaki binge eater, prezderu. i pazi sad rimljane dekadentne nijedne od morskih pasa: izbljuju van sve sto nije ultrakvalitetno od sirotih lignjica, progutaju ono sto jest i nastave sa zderancijom. sjajno.

sretaaaaaan mi rodjendan!!!! i to. bas mi je dobar. i kaj nije super kad cijela zemlja slavi tvoj rockas? i jos dobijes praznik (citaj: neradni dan) u to ime.

kako napisati shakespeareanski sonet...

My heart hath been bleeding, the sorrow profound
hath made it hollow, it made me abhor.
I feeleth something, and thought never, never more.
Now thou hath come, and this mortal soul
Again is in turmoil over dream that may be afore.
O, lest the world task you to recite what merit lives in me, so that I may prove to be your true muse and live forever in thy dreams.
O, lest thine true love mayst seem false in this, that thou for thy fondness speak too well, though not untrue of me.
May in this life, or another as it mayst be
We meet again, unburdened, joyful and free.
Until such meet we must surrender to the fate
Which was forced upon us by the worldly ghouls
Until such meet we must pray
We both become more than mortal, blind fools.

Sadly enough, life is a lethal disease. Though not lethal enough. I mean, some people live just way too long. Isn’t a couple of years sufficient to acquire experience, get disillusioned, wither and die? Some people just insist on keeping on with living. Blind fools, I tell you. Nothing ever improves. You never get a second chance. You don’t get younger, thinner or more beautiful. Hence the plastic surgery. Hence botulin injections. But all solutions are temporary. Whatever you do, you’ll end up in a tomb, alone. Albeit all the attempts to do anything that could even vaguely improve any aspect of your life. If you have a weight problem and manage to solve it, lose weight and turn into an amazing looking runway model look-alike, the next day, week or month you’ll lose your job, boyfriend/girlfriend, get mugged, killed, you’ll be diagnosed with an incurable and agonizing, but slow-progressing and debilitating disease. Or simply enough, your pounds will come back. With reinforcements. If you can’t get a job, when you finally find one, it’ll turn out to be your worst nightmare come true. Or vacation in hell. Your boss will sexually harass you intermittently. Your colleagues will try to undermine your work as soon as you leave to have a piss. Or your work load will be so immense you will cease to have any social life whatsoever. If you have a medical problem, as soon as you find a way to ease it or cure it, next day it’ll turn out that the side-effects of the drug you’ll end up using will turn you into a zeppelin hovering low over the innocent by-standers in the streets, a horrifyingly disfigured stranger whose body has been taken over by aliens, your hair will fall out, you’ll get impotent, allegedly temporarily, you’ll lose your sex drive, sleep, appetite. Or simply get another disease, much worse than the original one. There’s no escape. Once you’ve been exposed to life, the surest thing to do is kill it before it spreads.