The restaurant at the end of the multiverse

(Prije nego što vam mrak padne na oči, to nije ONAJ tekst koji se tu pojavi svaka dva dana - ovaj je odličan, pročitajte ga!)

Remember the book "Men are from Mars, Women are
from Venus"? Well, here's a prime example offered by an
English professor at an American University.

"Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story.

The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person
sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will then write
the first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the
first paragraph and then add another paragraph to the
story. The first person will then add a third
paragraph, and so on back and forth. Remember to
re-read what has been written each time in order to
keep the story coherent There is to be absolutely NO
talking and anything you wish to say must be written
on the paper. The story is over when both agree a
conclusion has been reached."

The following was actually turned in by two of my English
students: Rebecca -last name deleted, and Gary
- last name deleted.

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STORY:

(first paragraph by Rebecca)

At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her
too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times,
that he liked chamomile But she felt she must now, at
all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness
was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much
her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was
out of the question.

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(second paragraph by Gary)

Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had
more important things to think about than the neuroses
of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with
whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago.
"A.S. Harris to Geostation 17, he said into his transgalactic
communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so
far..." But before he could sign off, a bluish particle beam
flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo
bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out
of his seat and across the cockpit.

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(Rebecca)

He bumped his head and died almost immediately but
not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically
brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon
afterwards,
Earth stopped its pointless hostilities
towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law
Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her
newspaper one morning. The news simultaneously excited her and
bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her
youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and
carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to
distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all
the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose
one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered
wistfully.

------------------------------------------------------

(Gary)

Little did she know, but she had less than 10
seconds to live. Thousands of miles above the city,
the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion
missiles. The dim-witted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral
Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth
a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who
were determined to destroy the human race. Within two
hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian
ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough
firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one
to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical
plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the
atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret
Mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off
the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive
explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid, Laurie and 85
million other Americans The President slammed his
fist on the conference table. "We can't allow this!
I'm going to veto that treaty! Let's blow 'em out of
the sky!"

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(rebecca)

This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature.
My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semi-literate
adolescent.

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(gary)

Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic
whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent
of Valium. "Oh shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I
have some other sort of F*CKING TEA??? Oh no, I'm such
an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels."

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(rebecca)

Asshole.

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(gary)

Bitch.

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(rebecca)

Wanker.

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(gary)

slut.

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(rebecca)

Get f*cked.

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(gary)

Eat sh*t.

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(rebecca)

F*CK YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!

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(gary)

Go drink some tea - whore.

**********************************************

(teacher)

A+ - I really liked this one.

e da, nema do tandem writinga za izražavanje sklada...:))

Or shall I have some other sort of F*CKING TEA???... hihihihihi ;)))))))))))

A ne čini vam se da i ovi komentari često sliče na ovo gore?... zato Vas i vooolem...

zakon igra :)
sljedeci put na Pedagogiji predlazem to svojima da ubijemo vrijeme :)